Friday, September 08, 2006

Football FANatic

We come across fanatics in all walks of like. Religion, politics, education, drugs, and of course… sports. True sports fanatics have a passion that is unequaled, with possible exception to Parrotheads at a Jimmy Buffett concert. Now they are some crazy people. But I digress… we were talking about sports fans. You see them in all sports but nothing compares with the football fan.

Don’t get me wrong, I love sports. I especially love football season, college and professional. There’s nothing better than tossing back a cold beer with friends watching the game… and there’s always a “the game”. But there are limits to my fanatic tendencies. Some people, well, they scare me. They scare most people.

Just the other week I’m watching a game and there was this one fan with wild blue hair, face and eyes made up like a demon, shirt slashed to ribbons, and holding a severed doll’s head that resembled the other teams mascot. I couldn’t help but think to myself… “Preacher, how are people going to take you seriously in the pulpit looking like that?” Oh well, if that doesn’t work out there’s always TV evangelism.

You used to only see fat guys who drink beer and take off their shirts in subzero weather and paint letters on their chests. For those guys I think it’s as much about showing how macho they are as it is about being a fan. Those guys are still there. These days’ women are getting drunk and taking their shirts off too. But I was raised not to talk about family. Besides, I’m sure Aunt Esther was quite perky 40-50 years ago.

Today fans are wearing elaborate costumes and makeup. Hell, sometimes you don’t know whether you’re in line for a football game or a KISS concert. I have season football tickets to a local college. There are about twenty people in our group and we had one guy who would go all out on game day. We’re talking face paint, wig, props… the works. Okay, I saw the girls who “volunteered” to do his makeup so he wasn’t totally stupid. This year he has calmed down quite a bit, and as you know, it takes a lot to calm down a sports fanatic. It could be the result of drugs, a lobotomy, or he could have gotten married. You just need that little inner/outer voice saying to you, “Not NO, but HELL NO.” Before you know it you’re showing up at games in khakis and a pullover sweater.

When it comes right down to it I could care less how far out people go to support their teams as long as;
• No one gets hurt
• It’s in the spirit of good sportsmanship
• It’s not downright offensive

Because when you get right down to it in the grand scheme of things… it’s just a game.

Of course I know that I’m crossing a line here. Them thar is fighting words for the true football fanatic.